apparently, words cannot express my sorrow, we could have been altogether different...
i dont know if i miss you, even though i do, only god and she known your true existence...
what if it was to be, a tragic family, rooted upon the dictation of a spiritual fallacy...
an infamous brutality, unfortunate circumstances forced on you, who i will never see...
mother with daughter, son without father, brother with a sister half his own but shares one soul...
washed away from the shores of life, a river engraved its way through bruises, new and old...
so in unbeknownst memory of you, i will scribe 1986 to remind me daily on my wrist...
no matter what has happened or will happen, i will remember, i love you little sis...

-apparently 1986-

she said she would see me when it was my time to go to where she was soon to arrive...
she closed her eyes and said goodbye, windows shattered inside, poured rain and cried...
and now i know the poison is not a curse, sometimes thats the way things unravel...
and now i know that death is what will happen, the final road, relief, to travel...
she lay so still, she lay at peace, while tears of saints stained the land around her...
i hid behind pipes and brews, a coward to the evil forces that took away her power...
but now i know that the cancer in her was nothing next to the cancer she was fighting...
the cancer of this world that she fought valiantly, she walked into gods arm, smiling...

-bride-

i wrote a song for you last night, plain and unadorned, just my guitar and i...
the music failed me more than i failed you, but i promise you that i still try...
a quiet little piece, two girls sleeping, scratchy throat, lowering the voice...
thought of past relationships and how lucky intuition proved you the best choice...
the sparkle in your eyes, my life easily consumed, music softly filling the room...
hush, acoustic, even if i play too weak or sing too rough, listen, hearts volume...
thats why i wrote this song, because i do remember you and will never forget...
no need for unforgiveable regrets, i worked my bones bare to not get you upset...
but you never cared, did you? i never noticed that all you wanted was devotion...
to be around, be near, be with me, same feelings lingering to back that notion...
so i wrote this song, appreciation for the absolute ecstasy we had and may still...
i take that back, there is no doubt in any corners inside my skull that we will...
so i wrote this song, hoping it would motivate me pick up my phone and call you...
have one of those conversations that we used to, long, beautiful, one from two...
and all we went through, knocking at my door, pursuing a wonderful relationship...
hope this is heartfelt in its unoriginality,wrote this for father, son and spirit...
i strive to be yours again, so i wrote this song, god, for you its rings true...
"i will walk by faith, and not by the ways of this world, i will walk, with you"...

-a song for you-